Surviving the Holidays: A Better Way to Navigate Grief This Season
The holiday season, often filled with joy and celebration, can also be a profoundly difficult time for those grieving the loss of a loved one. In the latest episode of A Better Way: The Podcast, I shared six practical, faith-based tips to help you navigate grief during the holidays with hope and healing.
Together with my co-host Isa, we explored the importance of honoring your grief, setting boundaries, and leaning into faith as powerful tools to move through this season.
Here are six steps to guide you through the emotional challenges of the holidays:
Step 1: Allow Yourself to Grieve and Seek God’s Comfort
Grief is part of the healing process, not a lack of faith. Suppressing your emotions only delays healing. Instead, acknowledge your grief and lean into God’s comfort through prayer and Scripture. “Grief is not about weakness; it’s about love and loss,” I shared during the podcast. “When my mom passed, the weight of every first holiday—Thanksgiving, Christmas—was overwhelming. But I realized that grief wasn’t something to avoid. It was something to walk through with God.”
Even Jesus wept when He lost someone He loved (John 11:35), showing us that mourning is a natural and sacred process. It’s okay to feel sadness and to seek the Lord’s presence for comfort during this difficult time.
Step 2: Lean on Your Faith Community for Support
We’re not meant to carry grief alone. Surround yourself with a supportive community, whether that’s a church group, close friends, or family. Sharing your burdens with others not only lightens the load but also reminds you of God’s love working through the people around you.
“God often sends people into our lives to comfort us,” I shared in the podcast. “I had someone who gave me ‘mom hugs,’ and it felt like God Himself was holding me through her love.” Isa added, “Sometimes we isolate ourselves, but God sends people to help us. You just have to let them in.” Galatians 6:2 reminds us, ‘Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.’ Opening up to those you trust can bring healing and peace during this season.
Step 3: Create New Traditions that Reflect Hope and Healing
Old traditions can feel bittersweet when a loved one is gone. Instead of forcing yourself to keep things the same, consider creating new traditions that honor their memory and reflect where you are in your healing journey. “I wear my mom’s necklace when I feel disconnected from her,” I shared. “It’s not just jewelry—it’s a reminder of her love and the strength she gave me.”
Isa shared how she meditates on her mother’s character and reflects on memories others have shared about her mom. Simple acts like lighting a candle, volunteering in honor of a loved one, or finding quiet moments of reflection can help you feel connected to their memory. As Isaiah 43:19 reminds us, ‘For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it?’ Creating new traditions can symbolize the hope and renewal God is bringing to your life.
Step 4: Practice Daily Gratitude and Reflection
Gratitude doesn’t erase grief, but it can shift your focus toward God’s blessings and provide a sense of perspective. Consider starting a gratitude journal or meditating on what you’re thankful for each day. “I’m grateful for the time I had with my mom and the faith she passed on to me,” I shared. “Focusing on what I’ve been given, even in grief, helps me stay grounded.”
Isa added, “Gratitude can be as simple as being thankful for a meal or a memory. It’s about finding the little lights that help you keep going.” Gratitude allows you to honor the legacy of those you’ve lost while strengthening connections with those who are still present. As Philippians 4:6-7 says, ‘Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.’
Step 5: Set Boundaries for Self-Care and Healing
The holidays often come with expectations, but it’s okay to say no to things that feel overwhelming. Boundaries are essential for protecting your mental and emotional health. “No is a complete sentence,” I reminded listeners during the podcast. “Setting boundaries allows you to focus on what God is calling you to do—not just saying yes to everything.”
Isa echoed this sentiment, emphasizing, “Boundaries protect your peace and allow you to be fully present for the things that matter most. Saying no isn’t selfish—it’s wise.” Even Jesus modeled this by withdrawing to spend time alone with the Father (Luke 5:16). Setting boundaries lets you care for yourself, conserve your energy, and prioritize your healing.
Step 6: Anchor Yourself in the Hope of Eternal Life
While the holidays can intensify grief, faith offers the comfort of eternal hope. For Christians, grief is not the end—it’s a season of longing until we are reunited with loved ones in heaven. “When my mom passed, I felt the peace of knowing she was with Jesus,” I shared. “I imagined Him taking her hand. That vision gave me strength to carry on.”
Isa added, “When we think of those we’ve lost, it’s okay to smile, cry, or even write them a letter. These acts remind us that we’re still connected through God.” Revelation 21:4 offers us assurance, ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever.’ Anchoring yourself in this hope can provide a sense of peace and strength to move forward.
A Better Way Guide
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Final Thoughts: A Better Way to Navigate Grief
Grieving during the holidays is not easy, but by allowing yourself to mourn, leaning on others for support, and creating new traditions, you can navigate the season with faith and resilience. “Grief is part of healing, but it doesn’t have to define you,” I shared in the podcast. “You can honor what you’ve lost while embracing the hope God offers.”
Isa added, “You can have joy in the middle of the storm and sorrow in the middle of a celebration. Grief doesn’t disqualify you from healing—it’s part of the process.”
This season, may you find comfort in God’s presence, gratitude in your daily life, and hope in the promise of eternal reunion. For more insights, check out my book, A Better Way: Integrating Faith and Psychology to Heal Inner Wounds. Together, we can find a better way to move forward and thrive.
